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Tuesday, July 19, 2011

How the national ID card (UID Card) will work

Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut . May I have your..."
Customer: "Heloo, can I order.."
Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose ID card number first, Sir?"
Customer: "It's here hold...on...889861356102049998-45-54610"
Operator : "OK.. You're..Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jal Vayu.....Your home number is 2x26xxxx, your office 250xxxxx and your mobile is 09xxxxxxxx. Which number are you calling from now Sir?"
Customer: "Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?
Operator : "We are connected to the system Sir"
Customer: "May I order your Seafood Pizza..."
Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"
Customer: "How come?"
Operator : "According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"
Customer: "What?... What do you recommend then?"
Operator : "Try our Low Fat Pizza. You'll like it"
Customer: "How do you know for sure?"
Operator : "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Dishes" from the National Library last week Sir"
Customer: "OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then, how much will that cost?"
Operator : "That should be enough for your family of 05, Sir. The total is Rs 500.00"
Customer: "Can I pay by! Credit card?"
Operator : "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir.Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs 23,000.75 since October last year. That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir.."
Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighborhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives"
Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your daily limit on machine
Withdrawal today"
Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?"
Operator : "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't Wait you can always come and collect it on your Nano Car..."
Customer: " What!"
Operator : "According to the details in system ,you own a Nano car,...registration number
Customer: " ?"
Operator : "Is there anything else Sir?"
Customer: "Nothing... By the way... Aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as
Operator : "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're also diabetic....... "
Customer: #$$^%&$@$% ^
Operator : "Better watch your language Sir.. Remember on 15th July 2010 you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman...?"
Customer: [Faints]

Monday, September 6, 2010

bum bum bhole .............

this tym my mind is preoccupied wit only 1 thing i.e farm ville on face book.whenever i switch on my PC my hands automatically search 4 d farm ville,my crops,harvest,my dairy farm & chicken coop oh god its all wat runs in my mind all d day,its high tym now even my parents & frnds scold me 4 my madness 4 d game im just addicted wat to do??
finally i got rid of it as i had problem loading d game it took lots of tym & i cud not w8 4 anymore >>>>>>> an idea struck in my genius mind y not do d real seeding & harvesting its just lovely to see a seed growing into a plants bearing leaves & flowers............ so i started growing sum potted plants at home i was busy watering my corn sprouts
it was 5 pm & door bell rang for three tyms,i had a scorn on my face as i knew who it was & my guess was true it was Dheeraj with his battalion of kids ready to make hell a lot of noise & hungama more than dance at d door.
Dheeraj: china akka!!!!!!
me: deniki??
Dheeraj:dance practice ivvala 5 to 6pm me intlo,akka told!!!!
me:oh gud,entamandi dance chestunaru???
Dheeraj:only we r doing other 2 guys have their semesters so they will not come!!!
me:ok come in >>>>

there were around 10 cute looking kids wit their innocent smiles ,very curious about their performance before d huge gathering on "Vinayaka chavithi" especially d two nitya's one with short hair & d other wit thick long hair & big black eyes r too gud, my sister is choreographing some songs for the festival,we had only 4 days left & 2 teach dem with their changing mood swings is a tough job but it was more fun & entertaining hour for see them dance was a gr8 pleasure,kids r concerned about their dresses & make up more than their steps,d way they move on to d next step on glance's,their energy & co-ordination is just amazing my expectations r high w8in 4 d day with my fingers crossed.......

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Ooty …….its one of d places associated wit my teenage dreams & fantasies ,when I saw d mo-vi geetanjali I fell in luv with d place with its awesum landscapes,air filled wit fog,clouds touching d sky & its greenery…I can say that its like god’s second own country as I got a chance to xplore this place a couple of months back.
We travelled from hyd to Coimbatore via train & from there we hired a indiga [d taxi drivers over there call it that way] to ooty,it was a 3 hrs journey o a ghat road wit the hair pin turns & I was much xcited to c d beautiful scenery & wanted to freeze dat moment there,even more lovely was d song I heard at d tym from roja-yeh haseen vadiyaa………., water falls on d way,& d thick cover of trees,fresh & cool air which was getting more colder as we reached d peak, it was like a gr8 relief after d harsh summer In hyd,
On d next day v had a joy ride on d toy train from Connor to ooty it was raining with d sun shinning bright on d oder side,d famous train song chaiya chaiya –dilse wad shot on d same train.
The third day was for site seeing I was sad coz I could not walk or climb d highest peak or d suicide point & I had to restrict myself to my car with a cup of the famous tea fresh from d factory ,it tasted gr8…
The Nilgiries with full of tea plantations all around & sum 1 could get lost in that,it was such huge,d smell of eucalyptus & other aroma oils,huge coniferous trees make ootakamundal a place worth visiting…….

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Questions ...True or False...

Can you guess which of the following are true and which are false?

1... Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning..

2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.

3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every 10 years.

4. People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being indoors a lot more.

5. When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop , even your heart!

6. Only 7 per cent of the population are lefties.

7. Forty people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.

8. Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until they are 2-6 years old.

9. The average person over 50 will have spent 5 years waiting in lines.

10. The toothbrush was invented in 1498.

11. The average housefly lives for one month.

12. 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year..

13. A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.

14. The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.

15. Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than any other time of day.

16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.

17. The REAL reason ostriches stick their head in the sand is to search for water.

18. The only two animals that can see behind themselves without turning their heads=2 0are the rabbit and the parrot.

19. John Travolta turned down the starring roles in 'An Officer and a Gentleman' and 'Tootsie..'

2 0. Michael Jackson owns the rights to the South Carolina State anthem.

21. In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.

22. Prince Charles and Prince William NEVER travel on the same airplane, just in case there is a crash.

23. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle ,built in 1903 , used a tomato can for a carburetor.

24. Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from women who give birth. They are used in vein transplant surgery.

25. Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were 7th cousins.

26. If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.

Answers below...

They are

all TRUE.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

hurray!!!!!!! dc is in d semi's.........

yahoo!!!!!!!!!! im xcited,thrilled & most happy coz DC (Deccan chargers-hyd)made it 2 d semi finals of IPL-3.i was eagerly w8in 4 dis moment wit my fingers crossed & by d end of d day we won d match,
i was really worried if v can,wit d low run-rate & started praying god that v shld was a do or die situation 4 both d teams(dc&dd).i had a bet wid my sister on d match.she always makes fun of me saying that if i see d match our team is not going 2 win,so it was more a prestigious issue 4 me,and it was fun 2 see dc its tym 4 sum celebration!!!!!

will it work

wat else.....though i keep calm,i think only positive,i dream about a better 2morrow,im happy even wit my smallest achievements , i feel that im 5yn when compared 2 others who r in very bad state.but still their is a deep sorrow inside me which doesn't allow me 2 laugh out loud.its becoming unbearable at tyms.
all these thoughts disturb me coz im sitting idle,yes "IDLE MIND IS DEVIL'S WORKSHOP".i need 2 b busy wit sum work,so 2 use my tym in a more productive way i was searching on d net & i found dis site. stem cells for attaxia .....

my mind is preoccupied wid d topic-stem cells since last week,if ny1 knows much abt it plz contact me on mail .im desperately searching for a cure so it may help not sure abt stem cell therapy ,can it b use full in my case &if its affordable, their is no much information in India &i can't take risk ,i have seen sum video's on d net & wrote 2 dem abt my condition,lets c if it works........

its Disgusting///////

It hurts wen every1 around me stair at me in public,(especially wen im walking it b'comes difficult 4 me 2 manage myself) anxiety levels OF people around r so high wen dey see me in public dat they can't control.& dey start scanning me frm head 2 toe , its irritating & i find no other way 2 avoid dem ......
if people hav so much of concern 4 me then they can make a general awareness programme & organize a support group or collect funds or fight 4 special privilege's 4 neurologically disordered people.........come & put ur feet in my shoe u wud know d torture im xperiencing.. rather than giving free suggestions.
im not a criminal nor terrorist or not a super star, then y im so privileged 2 grab d attention of a normal person & i did nt do ny crime,its nt my fault dat im disabled,its not even my choice bt its a gift 4rm god & im living wit it.
its my sincere plea don't embarrass ny disabled person wit ur disgusting looks.......